Rediscovering Yourself: Navigating the New Normal of Motherhood
Becoming a mom has been one my life’s most beautiful and transformative experiences. However, it has also come with a significant shift in priorities and routines. Amidst the joy and responsibilities of this little life, it's easy for us to lose sight of our own identity. But the good news is that it's possible to find yourself again and navigate this new normal in a way that honors both your role as a parent and your individuality. As a pretty seasoned mom of three - this SHIT IS HARD. The mom part comes easy, but the pouring into myself and rediscovering who I am has been really difficult to navigate and not feel guilty about. In this post, I hope to share three ways that have helped me embark on this journey of self-discovery.
1. Embracing Self Care
One of the first steps in finding yourself after becoming a mom is to prioritize self-care. Self-care isn't selfish; it's essential for your physical and mental well-being. Taking even a few minutes each day to care for yourself can make a world of difference. At the start of this year, I made it a goal to pursue any opportunity that allowed me to pour into myself. Here are some ideas to get you started:
a. Schedule "Me Time": Dedicate regular time in your calendar for activities you enjoy, whether it's reading, taking a bath, or going for a walk. For the first time in years, I have began reading again. I have found such joy in this new venture! I’ve also enjoyed planning lunch dates with friends, roller skating, getting my nails done and taking time to complete my devotional.
b. Accept Help: Don't hesitate to lean on your support system, whether it's your partner, family, or friends. They can provide you with breaks that allow you to recharge. I must admit, this is one I am still working on. It is very difficult for me to trust people with my kids and we have no family near. Therefore, my kids are with me and my husband 24/7. However, I have began accepting more invitations where I can “recharge” by spending time with friends while our children play. I have also become more vocal in communicating with my husband my needs or in letting go when he wants to take the kids for walk or bike ride without me.
c. Mindfulness: Incorporate mindfulness practices into your daily routine to reduce stress and gain a clearer perspective on your life.
2. Reconnect with the things that bring you joy
Before motherhood, you had interests, hobbies, and passions that made you unique. While your responsibilities as a mom are vital, they shouldn't overshadow these aspects of your identity. Here's how you can reconnect with your passions:
a. Start Small: Begin by dedicating short bursts of time to your interests. Whether it's painting, reading, or gardening, carving out even 15-30 minutes can reignite your passion.
3. Set Realistic Expectations
One of the biggest challenges for new moms is managing the pressure to be a "perfect" parent. It's essential to set realistic expectations for yourself and your family. Remember that it's okay to make mistakes, and perfection is an unattainable goal. Here's how to manage expectations:
a. Prioritize Your Well-being: Your mental and emotional health is crucial. Don't neglect your own needs while caring for your child.
b. Communicate Openly: Talk to your partner about your feelings and needs. They can provide valuable support and assistance.
c. Adjust Your Goals: Reevaluate your goals and expectations in light of your new role as a mom.
Becoming a mom is undoubtedly a life-altering experience, but it doesn't mean losing yourself in the process. Rediscovering your identity after becoming a mom is a journey that requires self-care, reconnecting with your passions, and setting realistic expectations. By prioritizing your well-being and nurturing your individuality, you can navigate the new normal of motherhood with grace, finding fulfillment in both your role as a parent and your sense of self. Remember, you deserve to flourish as a mom and as the unique person you are.
